We’ve heard this wayyyy too much: The only reason why you’re not getting something you want, is because you’re trying way too hard.
There are two extremes in every situation. You’re either trying too hard, or you’re not at all. But it’s okay, this is Coco’s very own Life Hacks 101.
1. Do Not Care
About requirements set in place. About restrictions. About limitations everyone has warned you about. About all the things people say you can’t do.
Most importantly, do not care even if you don’t eventually get it. That’s the way to getting what you want. My life has not been the smoothest, the happiest, the most peaceful. But whatever I’ve wanted which I’ve worked towards, I’ve gotten it.
Some people call it luck, but I call it an attitude. You can be in the worst situation possible with no way out. But if you just keep looking for that one way, you’ll get to it.
Some people are too bent on getting things in one way – that specific way they planned for themselves. That’s when they fail. This universe is wide beyond your imagination. There are a million ways to get to one place.
2. Want It Enough to Not Get It
And don’t waste your time worrying about not getting what you want. Take a relationship for example. The more you want someone, the more it shows in the way you talk, the decisions you make.
The more you want a job (cuz you need to feed yourself), the clearer the interviewer sees it and yes, now knows he can squeeze you dry. And soon enough, you’ll not want it anymore. The key to this is to want something enough to not want it.
To do so, you gotta understand that as much as it is a goal, it shouldn’t be something that cuts your light out if you can’t get it. It should be a motivation to something greater. Every goal is a dream, a candle, the light at the end of the tunnel – just because you don’t exit, doesn’t mean there isn’t another way out of this tunnel.
With that being said, the last point is what is most necessary.
3. Shut Up & Keep Working Towards It
Just because you want it, doesn’t mean you have to say it. But it does mean you have to work towards it. Prove things with actions, not words.
One reason many people have failed getting what they want, is that they often tell others how much they want it, but they don’t do it enough. Human behaviour 101: Say something too much and the opposite happens. That’s why people say don’t jinx it.
Recall a time you’ve expressed to a friend how much you want something. While you’re saying it, while the words come outta your mouth, you feel it a 100%. You go home, entirely convinced about the goals you’ve made for yourself with your friends, close your eyes, get some good sleep.
You wake up realising you’ve lost all motivation in it.
Been there done that. It is not that I hate sharing plans. But I have realised that many times when I start expressing something verbally, that’s when I start losing the drive to work towards it. This is similar in many situations – even a breakup. Remember telling your friend how much you can’t get over this guy but you wake up the next day feeling entirely different?
Think about it. Why is it called an “outlet of expression“? The more you express something = the less you suppress it = the less you feel it. This works the same across many things, from sob stories to happy goals.
So chin up, dgaf and happy October guys.